Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Tobacco inspired alternative dispute resolution

Caller: I got stabbed and I wanted to know if I could do anything about it.
Me: How badly were you hurt?
Caller: Not that badly. Just a couple of stitches.
Me: Well, how much were your medical bills?
Caller: Nothin…my insurance paid for them.
Me: Who stabbed you?
Caller: My buddy. It was an accident though. I just wanna get some cash.
Me: There is no reason for you to be talking to a lawyer.
Caller: I’m short some cigarette money. Can’t you help me get a little cigarette money??
Me: Just ask your buddy to buy you a pack of smokes and call it even.
Caller: That’s a damn good idea. You lawyers are fucking smart.

I wonder if the insurance company is entitled to claim part of the 'settlement' for reimbursement...