Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Going the extra mile in reverse

I don’t have any court today. It’s just going to be a day of trying to avoid as many phone calls as possible while writing motions, briefs and this blog post. It should be a nice and smooth day. But then I decided to go full suit today and attempt to encompass the professional look. So now I need to shave so as to not look like a total sleazebag. I do exactly that. And promptly slash my face open.

My face continues to bleed and thus throws my morning routine into shambles. I throw my head back (so as to let gravity clot my wound) and I attempt to button my shirt with one hand and the other applying pressure on my facial handiwork. In doing so, I rip the top button off as I am buttoning my shirt. Then I attempt to tie my tie [I’m saying to hell with convention, I’m wearing the buttonless shirt] and as I feed the end through the hole, the tie hits the cut thus getting an additional color on the blue silk. Then I look at the clock: I’ve spent so much time dealing with my issues that I will miss my morning train.

My morning in a nutshell: Cut, rip, stain, miss. And it hasn't even started to snow yet.