If Laughter is the Best Medicine, Then Family Should Not Talk to Me Before I've had my Coffee

You could also title this post: How I react to shitty fucking news

The first phone call I get at the office today:

My Dad: I just wanted to let you know that I went to the doctor this morning and it turns out I have skin cancer.
Me: Good morning to you too, jackass

The day can only get better, right?