Friday, March 04, 2011

When your job gives you lemons, throw them at your partner

The last couple of weeks have been rather intense at the office. I’ve been swamped with court appearances, depositions of people that suck and lots and lots of phone calls with people that just want to waste my time.


This doesn’t even factor in the mindless bitch work that is getting dumped on me in any given day. Frankly, I don’t care what my partners give me to do.

Until I start getting blamed for their mistakes.

But, as an associate...no, strike that...as an associate in a horrible job market, short of going postal, what can you do? It’s a question that I’ve been pondering a lot lately (especially when I’ve been having my morning whiskey) and I wish I could come up with the best way to address this issue.

I figure that I’ve got a couple of options how I can respond:

Option A
Take the abuse, shut up about it and just stifle it along with every other reason that you are presently searching for new employment.

Upside: Retain your job.
Downside: Liver disease.

Option B
Discuss the matter with said partner behind a closed door in his office. Politely and professionally discuss what happened that lead to the error (i.e. how the partner f***ed up and how you are blameless) and offer suggestions for ways that this problem can be avoided in the future.

Upside: Maybe retain your job, clear your conscious of not standing being wrongly accused of a minor f*ck up and perhaps improve the day-to-day work product of your boss.
Downside: Maybe not retain your job, move to a higher priority on your partner’s shit list and liver disease.

Option C
Next time the Partner blames you for the slightest problem, no matter the location, list every single screw up that has been the result of the partner’s actions and/or inactions. List his personal failings and other problems with enhanced vocal volume so that everyone in your zip code can hear you. End with the classic summation: YOU NEED ME MORE THAN I NEED YOU! Storm off.

Upside: You’d likely make Above the Law in an entertaining manner.
Downside: No more job. No more ability to fund your liver disease. No chance of working in a law firm as a lawyer ever again.

Fact of the matter is that I don’t have the tact or ability to politely point out a mistake so I am resigned to taking Option A.

I just wish I had the balls for Option C.