The bite clearly did not cause a fatal wound. Shame.

Caller: I have an animal bite case.
Me: Why don't you tell me what happened and we'll see if you have a case.
Caller: I got bit at the zoo.
Me: Um. Ok. How'd that happen?
Caller: I was standing in front of the cage.
Me: But how'd the animal bite you?
Caller: I stuck my hand into the cage.
Me: That was stupid.
Caller: What you mean?!? That animal hurt me. They should pay me for that!!!
Me: No they shouldn't.
Caller: What the f*** are you talking about...I'm in pain!!
Me: Of course you are...

The secretary that has overheard all of my calls for the previous two years has rated this as the best ever.

So, I've got that going for me. Which is nice.