Circuit Court of Cook County
Me: I’m looking for a little help on this filing…Clerk: I’m on my lunch break.
Me: But…
Clerk: Lunch. Break.
Northern District of Illinois
Me: I’m looking for a little help on this filing…Clerk: Let me help you with that (looks at it) this will be no problem…
Northern District of Alabama
Me: I’m looking for a little help on this filing…Clerk: Ok, this should be no problem. (Rattles off three simple steps to follow). Now you have also file your Pro Hac Vice Application.
Me: Um. Uh…
Clerk: Go to the website, on the left side, three quarters of the way down, click on the instructions. (Waits for me) Now enter your information on this form (Waits for me again). All set?
Me: Yes ma’am.
Clerk: Now, what was your last name again?
Me: P-A-M-B-Y
Clerk: Mr. Pamby, I am going to head over to attorney services to make sure that you get expedited. Now, if you have any trouble with your actual filing, let me give you my direct line.
Me: Thanks for everything.
Clerk: But I am going to be leaving in about 20 minutes for the day. Let me also give you my cell phone number, my assistant’s number and my co-worker’s number. If you can’t get a hold of me, one of them will be able to help you out right away.
Time to move to Alabama. And take a job from this guy.
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