Five Postmortem Notes on the Chicago Olympic Bid

1. Mayor Daley didn’t take enough lessons from his Father and stuff the damn ballot box. Imagine the IOC President announcing the vote tallies: “Number of Eligible ballots 94. Number of Eligible Votes cast 3948…”

2. The Olympics will be in Rio de Crimenero. In Rio, guns don’t kill people, the Cops do. Or the druglords.

3. The Chicagoans for Rio are happy. The Chicagoans for 7 years of fixing shit with lots of graft, overruns and taxpayer expense (a.k.a. business as usual) are sad. The Chicagoans for a Cubs World Series will just keep on waiting.

4. Kanye weighed in with pith, elegance and a bottle of Cognac: “I’m really happy for you, I’m gonna let you finish, but Chicago had one of the best Olympic Bids of all time.”

5. Do you think that the IOC voters giggled when they said "And now without further delay, the President of the National of Brasil, The Honorable Lulu..."