Us Lawyery Types, We are…well…we just are.

Newbie Attorney: Come here! [As he is running away from his office, he waves me over]
Me: What’s wrong?
Newbie Attorney: I’m on a new protein shake and it is making me gassy as all hell. I just ripped a giant fart in my office and I can’t stay in there it smells so bad.
Me: [After I stop laughing] What about the attorney that you share office space with?
Newbie Attorney: Oh, she knows.

The Next Day:

Me: How’d your dinner go?
Newbie Attorney: Dinner-Date.
Me: How’d your dinner-date go?
Newbie Attorney: I had to keep excusing myself to go fart.
Me: [Laughing so loud that another attorney tells me to shut up]
Newbie Attorney: I told her of “my condition” and then I paid for dinner by gift certificate.
Me: Suave, Debonair and gassy. The date obviously went well then.
Newbie Attorney: What can I say? I’m a true romantic.