City lawyer experiences the semi-rural law practice; death ruled accidental

I was out in court today about 50 miles from Chicago. It's a different world out there. The lawyers are polite. The clerks are friendly. The bailiffs (yes, they call them bailiffs...who knew?) are helpful. Much to my surprise they have electricity and running water out in what one might call 'the boonies.'

And now we've arrived at what I learned today: after nature the morning coffee makes its reappearance and you are washing your hands, be sure to look at the faucet as you grab to turn it on. If you don't follow this advice, you may make a very wet mistake.

As I was in the bathroom about to wash my hands, I did not realize that this court house bathroom sink has a combo water spigot. One part, not the main part mind you, was the regular spigot. The other part, the main part, I can only describe as a high pressure eye ball washer. I wish I had looked first, but I didn't and I got drenched.

I first got hit in the cheek and as I instinctively backed away, but stupidly didn't let go of the faucet, the stream of water moved down my neck and then proceeded to attack my shirt, tie, and suit. My top was soaked. Pink and purple silk ties do not mix well with water.

The good news was that I had already been in court for the morning.

The bad news was that as I was leaving the small town courthouse, the sheriff's deputy mocked me as I left.