They let the crazy one run this joint

I'm at the low end of the totem pole here in Chicago. Not at the bottom mind you, but damn near it, but the attorneys are at a conference today. That being said, I'm the boss today. After finishing Anonymous Lawyer: A Novel, I've been inspired with a few ideas to make my day more worthwhile (while potentially frustrating those that I supervise):

Copier Races: There are reams of documents that need to be copied, stapled, and prepared for various clients. First to the copier and back with the documents in the proper form wins lunch on me. What they don't know is that I have demagnitized the copy card rendering it useless [we needed a new one anyway].

Coffee Runs: Extra Large, Cream and Sugar. No real challenge to this one, except since the elevators have been on the fritz, they have to walk the 45+ flights of stairs. Lord knows that when we had to evacuate the building earlier this week (a transformer underneath the building decided to do it's little song and explosion thing) I ran up and down those stairs and my legs still are still sore [don't get me started on what this did to my knee either]. And if my coffee is cold by the time they get back, well, they'll be booked on an express flight back to Dunkin Donuts.

Court Filings: It's damn hot in Chicago. The Daley Center (for those of you not from Chicago, where a portion of the City's courts are located) is a good distance, but less then a mile, away. I wonder if I could rustle up a rickshaw and have them take me in manner befitting my nobility to court and back. Just to realize that I had 'forgotten' a vital piece of the filing.

You could say that this whole power thing is going to my head.

But I would try to have you fired if you did.