My Fellow Americans...

First stop campaigning, second stop election, third stop the Navel Observatory [haha...Navel]. At least I think that is where the Vice-President lives. [or is that Naval Observatory...]

That's right, I've decided to sell my soul for a resume entry [no, I'm not writing on to Law Review] and I have tossed my name into the ring for the Student Bar Association VP race.

That's right, I'm campaigning to be #2. It's hard to do so when you have an ego that will suffocate small mammals, but I figure that I should take baby steps towards 'Master of the Universe, Ruler of All, JD.' I figure if all else fails, I could take the president quail hunting...

Regardless, my name is in the ring. I've formed a platform. I suppose all that is left is the prostituting myself out actual campaigning for votes. I really hate talking about myself in the campaign sense. Why I am better. Why I will do a better job. Why my opponents eat the unborn. I just don't like that.

Anyways...here it goes. Vote for me, I like French Cuffs, I'll get my shit done, and I didn't drool on myself in the last 5 minutes 30 seconds.

If that isn't qualified to lead...then I don't know who is.