Monday, February 14, 2005

V-Day at the SCOTUS

The All-Star Nine Have their plans all set out for this years Valentine's Day:

Scalia: In his non-stop Chief Justice campaign, Justice Scalia (the Big A to his friends) has a blind date with a gay man, a feminist, and a Gitmo Detainee.

O'Connor: Plays on the swing her robes.

Thomas: The membership of the Black Republican caucus have their annual getaway at a secluded log cabin in Illinois. Colin Powell, Condie Rice, Justice Thomas, and Trent Lott all get together to sing Kumbayah, laugh about their troubles, and make plans for St. Patrick's Day.

Souter: Will compete in an all day marathon of Halo 2 on xBox Live

Kennedy: Spends the day writing lyrical poetry that will be incorporated into his next opinion. Has a hard time with getting the word jurisprudence into the cadence of his latest poem.

Ginsburg: She and Dorian Gray meet to discuss about their love of self-portraits

Stevens: As he sits alone at home, wonders what it would be like to kiss Justice O'Connor

Rehnquist: Breathe in, Breathe out, repeat

Breyer: In an insult to his family roots, Justice Breyer spends the day eating Hagen-Daz Yogurt