Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Why do I love my job? Because.

Last Week
Me: You have to be at the appointment you scheduled tomorrow at 11:00 a.m.
Client: What do you mean I have to go? I don’t want to go.
Me: You have to go otherwise your case will not settle.
Client: What do you mean?
Me: If you don’t go to the doctor, you don’t get any money.
Client: …uhh…What’s the address?
Me: [Gives the address]
Client: I don’t know where that is.
Me: [Gives directions]
Client: Slow down.
Me: [Repeats three times] Let me give you the phone number as well. This is incredibly important and you have to go.
Client: You remember that doctor’s appointment?
Me: Yes, yes I do.
Client: I didn’t make it.
Me: Oh really?
Client: I didn’t know where I was going. I left, then I got frustrated, then I turned around
Me: I need to put you on hold for a sec [pushes hold, slams phone against head, grabs client file and hits self with it, pushes hold again] Did you reschedule?
Client: Yeah. For tomorrow.
Me: Good.  This is all we need to settle your case.
20 Minutes Later
Client: Hey, Namby, I don’t want to go to this doctor’s appointment, can I just send someone else?
Me: No. You have to go.
15 Minutes After That
Client: I don’t know how to get there.
Me: Do you still have the doctor’s phone number?
Client: No.
Me: Let me give it to you again, and you call him.
Another 5 Minutes After That
Client: Can you drive me?
UPDATE: 3/26/2009
Me: How did the Doctor’s appointment go?
Client: I didn’t go. I’m not going to go.  Never.