Why I love my job

Me: [As I am putting gloves on about to walk out the door] Attorney, do you need anything while I am out?
Attorney: No, I don't need anything. [Looks up from her computer] It looks like you are about to commit a crime. You have leather gloves on while wearing a pinstripe suit. [A partner walks by] Partner, doesn't it look like Namby is about to commit a crime?
Partner: His very existence is a crime.