Sunday, October 15, 2006

That guy opens his mouth...and I get the desire to hurt myself

I'm play softball that guy.

You likely know the type. That guy is...how does one say this in a world of political correctness...that guy is the type that I don't think identifies with the ethnicity that was checked on his birth certificate. On my softball team, he shows up in his beat-up, Mid-90s Model Ford-Explorer and he jumps out with the swagger as if 15 guys got out of the car with him. He is sporting his Black Yankees cap with the New Era sticker still on, 3 fake diamond earrings, and a faux-silver chain. He's a skinny kid that wasn't blessed with the ability to grow facial hair...however that doesn't stop him.

He can't field to save his life, hence why he is stuck in right field where the other team doesn't hit it too often. Between one of the innings, a woman comes up to him and asks to borrow the car. His response, well...his response was:

"You scratch my rims, you buy my truck!"
The woman was his mom.