Judicial Lessons from Class

On Writing a Complaint:
"Use wherefore, not therefore. Therefore is English, where is not. If you use English the Judge won't know what the hell you are talking about"

On How to Tell a Judge he is Mistaken:
"Judge, you are stupid, respectfully"

On How Not to Persuade the Court:
"As soon as she started reading her argument to me, a little light switch clicked on in my brain and it gave me permission to not listen or care"

Something we Knew All Along:
"I'm a Judge, I have an Article III ego. I can be stupid, you can't"