Fellow Homeboys,
“Judas, why don’t you turn Me over to Pilot.”Needless to say, I wasn’t too keen on this idea. I didn’t want the rest of the 12 thinking I had gone Brokeback Crucifixion and all. But you know, Jesus was quite the persuasive figure. He pushed harder and I finally was ready to go along with His crazy idea. It was getting late when he added a few last words of wisdom that I don’t understand:
“What you talking ‘bout, Jesus? You sure that wine isn’t playing tricks on You or anything?”
“No man, I gotta do this thing for Dad. It’s either We get to do this way, or I figure that I can go around de-pantsing a bunch of Pharisees. You know how they are…you de-pants them once and discover they are going commando, they lose their sense of humor.”
“But how should We do it?”
“Maybe you approach with the hoards of soldiers and I’ll be like ‘I knew it was you Judas, you broke My heart. Judas...you broke My heart…and that’s when you move towards Me and deliver a loving peck on My forehead. Then they lead Me off and We have a good laugh about it over some wine a few days later.”
“Well, you should probably write all this down just in case someone doesn’t understand what you did.”So that’s what happened this night. I am not sure what Jesus was thinking in asking me to do this for Him. But looking at the bright side, I’ll get the disciples rent paid with the money that the Priests will give me. Hope all is well with you on your side.
“You think?”
“I’m not saying…but I’m sayin…”
“Why wouldn’t people understand?”
“I dunno…it’s just a thought. Besides every one else is writing stuff down these days. Matthew, Mark, Luke and Phil”
“You mean Paul right?”
“Yeah…maybe.”
p.s. I’m sending this via Roman mail. Maybe I should have used FedEx? I hope this gets to you in due time.
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